Tuesday, October 12, 2010

O (Un)Holy Night

Ah, Fall is in the air...that magical time of year heralded by the crisp morning dew, the changing colors of the deciduous leaves, and the anti-Halloween nuts sticking in my craw.

Yes, them.  Who could forget the people who would have you believe that if you dress up your kids in those evil Spider-Man costumes and go door-to-door begging for candy, you are participating in the same pagan rituals that could one day make you into a goat-sacrificing devil-worshiper who slips razorblades into candied apples?  Yes, folks, it's time to jump on that bandwagon once again and go on another witch hunt.

Having grown up in a strict Evangelical household, I am well-versed in "hallelujah nights" and other such "Halloween alternatives."  I even have friends who, while we were in high school, dressed up as Apostles and walked the neighborhood handing out religious tracts on All Hallow's Eve.

I don't necessarily regret any of that, but one of my main criticisms of most modern Christians is they spend far too much time pointing out how wrong everyone else is, instead of trying to convince them that their interpretation of a certain Jewish carpenter is better than whatever they're into.  I am frequently amused at how such otherwise well-meaning Christians single out things like this or Harry Potter or the magic of Disney, or try to rally the troops to put Satanic toothpaste makers out of business, but conveniently forget that our most holiest of days -- Christmas and Easter -- also have their roots in "pagan" rituals.  (At least, according to a simple Google search.)  Never mind that most Christians are completely ignorant of the actual history of Halloween or its associated urban legends; indulge me for a moment while I pick apart some of the more common arguments against Halloween:

1.  Trick-or-treating is bad because some poor people (centuries ago) used Oct. 31 to beg for food.  Really?  Even though it was "officially" started in our country in 1943, in order to stem the tide of miscreants running amok, and it worked?

2.  Dressing up in costumes (witches, ghosts, etc.) is bad because some Druids did it to fool evil spirits.  Hm...I thought fooling evil spirits was a good thing.

3.  Jack-o-lanterns are bad because Druids used them.  Didn't they use them to light the way for the good spirits, or to ward off the bad ones?

4.  Some people do bad things on Halloween, so good people shouldn't celebrate it.  Don't people do bad things on the other 364 days of the year?

Just like vegans who wear leather shoes with non-recycled rubber soles, Christians who criticize Halloween revelers are misguided at best, and are at the very least ignorant of the Bible.

Here's the point:  the Apostle Paul wrote that what is sin to one person is not necessarily sin to another, so Christians ought not to criticize one another for celebrating one thing or another (look it up yourself, I'm too lazy - hint: New Testament).  Most anti-Halloween crackpots will point out that ancient Celts used all sorts of things in their rituals, like bobbing for apples, bonfires, or other things most sane people consider harmless.  (I'm not making this up - see links on the first article linked above.)  But they single out trick-or-treating as the one evil thing that's sending our kids straight to hell in a literal hand basket.  What the Celts did centuries ago, or the Satanists do now, with those symbols of their religions should be of no concern to anyone who chooses to celebrate Halloween -- in the same way that ancient Roman sun-worshiping practices have no bearing on how we celebrate Christmas.  Those symbols mean different things to different people -- and to most, nothing at all.

Here's another point:  modern Protestants seem to think that almost all things Catholic are bad, and apparently blame the Catholics for starting Halloween in the first place.  Yet, those same Catholics who created All Saints Day also made Christmas and Easter from various other pagan holidays (again, look it up yourself).  So, by extension of logic, those who exchange gifts and watch A Miracle in 34th Street on Dec. 25 are also participating in the same heathen rituals as did the Roman sun-worshipers prior to the fourth century A.D. (or is it C.E.?  I'm always confused.)  And those who let their kids hunt for colored eggs on Easter are equally leading them blindly into paganism.  I have never been Catholic, but I'm not inclined to think that they are any more wrong than any other religion.  The Council of Nicaea apparently thought that warding off evil spirits before the day of remembering the good ones was a good thing, so Halloween really can't be all that bad.

The well-meaning woman who wrote the article linked above (okay, here it is again) says that when you go grocery shopping, you are still a grocery-shopping participant even though you don't buy everything in the store...so, if you dress up like My Little Pony and beg for candy at strangers' doors, you are inviting evil in your life just like the ancient Celts.  Which is a lot like saying that doing your laundry in your garage makes you a car.  Or a washing machine, which is what I would probably dress as this year if I weren't so lazy.

So, what are you going as?  Just make sure you don't bob for apples near any bonfires - you'll go straight to hell for that.